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An Original Piece of Art.
♥ DeS =]
16 YrS YOUNG
D.O.B ~ 9 FeB
AqUaRiuS
Ex HaI~SiAn/ (1e3-2e3-3e1-4e1 '10) BaNd AlUmNi-TuBiSt/ PrEfEcT - AdViSoR/ MemBEr Of E501 <33 Blue lover<33 
Fun.Laughter.Peace.Joy.Amour.
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Sunday, April 17, 2011 @ 10:07 PM just realised a great singer! Sang "You are for me" yesterday during P&W! super LOVE that song! ^^ made me feel all lurved again~ heheee! anyway! tomorrow's the 1st day of school! i have mixed feelings though. firstly, i was just walking home yesterday after all the fellowshipping. and a thought came to me. well, it came to me when i was going svc too.. and after i ran yesterday and was slowly waling to cool down. ANYWAY! i was thinking mostly about myself. i realised that i don't feel like myself anymore. something bout me's changing and i feel lost. Like i've changed into a diff person! :C not that happy. like i've treated people i dont know more as a stranger? and treated people i know as.. well.. maybe a like a stranger too? i DONT KNOW? i just feel like i've grown further away from my friends.. :C and i didnt go for the FOC too. im just scared that everyone would've formed a clique or something before me. and then i'll be kinda left out. im really really scared :/ after listening to the song, i feel kinda more peaceful? but still... i really really scared that history repeats itself! is having friends before.. a good thing or a bad thing? because when you move on in life, and your good friends become distant.. you'll feel even more lonely than what you remember.. isnt that even more sad and bitter-like.. you'll feel cold and sad. dont get me wrong, im not emo-ey and stuff.. im just afraid! sigh. i have to learn to let go yea? the thing is.. i DONT KNOW if i've already let go of my past stuff. neither do i know if im ready to accept new things. stubborn as i am, i dislike changes! i dislike new things. things that i dont know about nor have confidence in. i really miss a lot of thing. im afraid that even the closest friends of mine become distant. im afraid that even my closest friends become strangers within a few months or years. after all, my friends are what makes my life so precious and lovely! but im real glad that school's starting. at least it gives me a reason to do something! after all, i feel all lifeless without anything to look forward to really. maybe sch's not bad. although i'll feel more stressed up all over again. maybe that familiar feeling will come back. maybe~ even the closest of all friends
will turn into strangers someday if we do not put in the effort to meet and talk to them. but it's a two way thing. both party's gotta put in the effort. am i willing? and are you willing to keep this friendship going? |